Gullible Senator Susan Collins Gives Annual Economic Report - Country In Deep Doo-Doo

Funny story written by UncleDale

Friday, 22 July 2022

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Bad fiscal policy makes Ben Franklin sad.

Senator Susan Collins of Maine - who will believe anything any other Republican tells her, (and is still in office) - gives her annual July economic assessment. She is still a loyal Trump Ring kisser and won't criticize him.

She has always been an eager student of Economics - has never once been Right - but loves writing the Assessment

She thinks July, when things are in full swing, is a good time to assess the country's Economic health.

She is alarmed this year. All the advance stock tips she got ahead of rising stock prices, proved wrong - so she lost money. Things just didn't work this year.

"I am alarmed, she said in her Assessment. People have stopped buying things and are Spending Sensibly. If people spend sensibly the Economy could Collapse. We need people to buy Frivolously - stuff they don't need - go deep in Debt - that is what keeps out country Prosperous.

“Please out there - go out and do your patriotic duty - and overspend - (every month would help).

“This Sensible Spending could permanently ruin America.

“(And my stock buying.)

“It is all the fault of Wall Street, The Federal Reserve and the banks.

“Due to them, there is no cheap houses anymore - no cheap rent - no cheap food, no cheap gasoline - no cheap anything.

“During Covid, the Fed gave the Corporations Trillions of Dollars which they frittered away on big salaries and buying other financially crappy businesses. Now to make up for this - the Fed is putting the screws to us, the Consumers. They are causing the food and rent inflation, with higher Interest Rates - all, because the corporations screwed up.

“The Mob, instead of going to the Capitol building and trashing it - should have gone to the Federal Reserve building.

“You can be elected President without a lot of the voters - but you can't be elected President without lots of Corporate Cash.

“Me, Senator Suzy Collins, is a perfect example of that. "


The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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