Danish Cheese Stinks

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 7 July 2021

image for Danish Cheese Stinks
French cheeses stink too, but French losers are not planning to invade the UK!

A tiny EU nation stuck above North Germany, home to Legoland, a naked mermaid, and Peter Schmeichel, is causing quite a stir across the North Sea.

Those residing on the outer-periphery of EU unification are about to be invaded by something that causes fridges to smell as soon as the plastic packaging is open. A pungent odour then reaches the nostrils of purchasers of this rather odd, idiosyncratic product normally only tolerated by heathen Vikings with smelly armpits and fishy feet.

Danish cheese stinks! Havarti, Esrom, Danbo, etc, is about to wreak havoc in UK fridges! Hence, the decision to withdraw from a 'block' which has to tolerate the stench because Danish stinky cheeses are a product of the 'Block' and cannot be obliterated like bottles of revolting Marmite, Made in UK.

Thousands of Viking Danish footy fans are about to invade the sacred city of Londinium demanding that their armpits and feet are allowed to stink for the time of the invasion, and their beloved cheeses are available in supermarkets all over the city. Euro multis, Lidl and Aldi, being rather cheap, and not nasty, but nearly, have accommodated their Danish brethren's demands and ordered tons of Danish cheese for the duration of the invasion.

Brit lovers of Danish stinking cheese are 'over the moon' that they can now purchase as much of the stinking stuff as they desire, sadly, their children are not because the fridge pongs!

The Danish invasion will only last for a few days, the pungent odours of Viking sweaty armpits, bad-breath, and fishy feet will disappear, but the pungent smell of Danish cheeses left in UK fridges will remain for slightly longer, unfortunately.

However, there is a 'Silver lining to every Dark Cloud' floating across this rather weird island stuck in the North Sea; non-stinking, genetically manipulated cheeses, which taste like plastic wrapped in plastic, are about to invade the UK from 'Big Brother' in the mighty USA. A trade deal that was signed between two morons before one was taken to the cleaners by the IRS, and the other claiming the Delta Variant was imported by hooligan Danish Vikings getting their bacon, and certainly not returning pilgrimage Indians because he needs their vote in the next UK election!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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