Yannis Varoufakis, the tieless Greek Finance Minister
Here, at Vacuous Mag's Beauty Desk, we're more concerned with the Superficial, than the Real.....We asked Yannis Varoufakis, the newly elected Greek Finance Minister, about his motorbike, colour coordination and sex-life. Vacuous : Hi Yannis Yannis : Good afternoon V : You turned up to Downing St on a motorbike, shave head and leather jacket, with electric blue shirt....are you the...
Read full storyDead Argie Prosecutor 'Had Daft Warrant For President' - Sure Sign Pope To Blame
Buenos Aires - Pope Frankie-the-Argie is in the dog house tonight following Revelations** that a senior Buenos Aires prosecutor has dropped dead because of a 'daft' warrant. His Holiness' psychotic daughter Kristina Fernandez de Kirchner is also i...
Read full storyGun nut says White Americans (only) Should Own Artillery
Gun nut, racist, xenophobe, homophobe and staunch NRA supporter Clem Snout made an emotionally charged speech today on the state of "his" America. Well that's just a bunch of liberal crapola what them Jews and fags and darkies say about too many guns! The more firepower in the hands of white Americans the better - and I mean even kinda weirdy WHITE Americans! -- If a few folks get nailed alo...
Read full storyRand Paul, Chris Christie, Huckabee On Measles
The GOP candidates for president in 2016 so far have taken a "pro-choice" position on vaccinations. Carly Florina former, CEO of Hewellt-Packard said, "Gosh, when I was a kid, I got measles chicken pox and mumps. And I'm still here. What's the big...
Read full storyHairy Reid: "I may be down for the count, but don't count me out"
Hairy Reid (D-NV), ousted as Senate majority leader by American voters in the last election and blinded by the light of divine revelation (God, allegedly, has shown Hairy that that it's way past time for him to surrender the reins of political power...
Read full storyHelen Flanagan is pregnant
The former Rohhhr-zeee from Coronation Street, Helen Flanagan, has been reported as being pregnant, and this reporter wishes her well and, at the appropriate moment, 9 months into her pregnancy, hopes she becomes the proud mother of a healthy and hap...
Read full storyEar of the Tiger
First, there was the photo showing Tiger Woods missing front tooth. Now, a more recent photo shows that Tiger is also missing his left ear. When asked about it by a reporter, Tiger nonchalantly shrugged it off saying, "It's due to a shaving acc...
Read full storyChris Christie refuses to shower in GOP locker room
DES MOINES, IA - It was reported today that New Jersey Governor Chris Christie refused to shower with other GOP hopefuls after the 2015 Freedom Summit hosted by Iowa Congressman Steve King. At the annual event several potential presidential candid...
Read full storyThings are hotting up in eastern Ukraine!
Jaggedone's CIA reporter gets crushed by Ukrainian separatist tank but manages to get his report out before Putin gives him a bullet in the head, and here it is: Brave, star Georgian CIA reporter and ex-Russian Roach-Spy in Afghanistan, Vladimir V...
Read full storyBus Nutjobs Becoming Rare - Advertising Campaign Launched To Recruit More
A survey among bus passengers has revealed that only one in every fifty buses now has a regular "fruitcake" passenger. Bus companies have placed full page advertisements in all the major newspapers to try to recruit and train new applicants. The surv...
Read full storyPunxsutawney Phil Predicts Six More Weeks of Climate Change
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA - The world famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, made his annual appearance today, kind of saw his shadow, and proclaimed to America that there will be six more weeks of climate change. We spoke to Phil about his celebrity status and the pressure of accurately predicting the weather to hundreds of millions each year: Good morning, Phil. How's it going? "Oh hey, welcome to my...
Read full story