Russell Brand and Bob Dylan To Record An Album
LONDON, England - It is now official, famed British comedian Russell Brand, 33, will be recording an album with American pop music icon Bob Dylan, 67. Dylan's manager Rocco Dockery confirmed that the legendary Dylan and the infamous Brand will be...
Read full storyMichael Jackson 'converts to Islam and changes name to Mikaeel'
The singer, who was raised as a Jehovah's Witness, converted to Islam in a ceremony at a friend's house in Los Angeles. He is said to have sat on the floor and worn a small hat while an imam officiated. According to The Sun, the ceremony took...
Read full storyReally Interesting Conversation Overheard on London Tube
Metropolitan Line London- During the 17:45 Baker Street to Harrow on the Hill journey today, the passengers on the second to last carriage were treated to an intensly interesting conversation between an unamed and somewhat plain (but trying really ha...
Read full storyParis Hilton Sex Video Wins SAG Award
The world was shocked when Johnny Depp took the Screen Actors Guild award of Best Actor for his role of Captain Jack Sparrow in the film Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl. The world was awed when Charlize Theron took the Screen Actor...
Read full storyCritics Hit Gulf State Culture Capital of the World Bid
Doha, capital of the gas-rich Gulf state of Qatar and personal bailiwick of the ruthless al-Thani dynasty, who have been cutting each other's throats for centuries, is destined to become the cultural capital of the world. At least that's the current...
Read full storyParis Hilton Verifies President Bush's Cocaine Problem
President Bush was dealt another deadly blow (pun intended) to his re-election bid last night. Ironically the damaging disclosure took place during a live broadcast of Fox Television's "The Simple Life 4" - Paris Hilton's latest hit reality show.
Read full storyPM Reacts to Increased Thefts of Livers: Bans Happy Hours!
London/ Mortuary Times - Reacting to a recent upturn in the forcible removal of livers from unsuspecting UK tourists, PM Gordon Brown was forced to act. The PM had been accused of turning "a blind eye" to the problem, but official complaints from the...
Read full storyGore Adapts Finnish M/05 Camouflage Apparel to Support Global WarmingTheory: Disappears Into Political Backround!
Helsinki/ Reuters - Once again the Human Sausage, Al Gore, leads the way to promote his vision of the consequences of Global Warming. His latest marketing ploy is to become the spokesman for Finnish Camouflage clothing utilizing the patented M/05 p...
Read full storyLabour Giving CPR to Economy is Flogging Dead Horse
Labour's Chancellor of the Exchequer, Alistair Darling, a former old rope salesman, was found lynched under Blackfriars Bridge early this morning, his pockets stuffed with supermarket discount vouchers and fruit machine tokens. Police Inspector E...
Read full storyRAF anti-UFO patrols above crystal 'Skull of Doom' exhibition
Edinburgh, Scotland - (X-Files Mess): It has been dubbed the 'Skull of Doom' following a spooky Inca prediction that it would curse any daftass Hollywood movie that used it to resurrect the flaccid acting career of Harrison Ford. And now the RAF i...
Read full storySenior Bankers Stranded In Siberia
A luxury private jet on route to Japan with some of Britain's most senior bankers on board, was forced to land at a remote airport in Siberia yesterday after the airline 'Carrion Jet Services' was put into administration. The pilot and crew have bee...
Read full storyYou Tube has new Welsh rival
The well known video sharing site 'You Tube' was consulting lawyers today over a potential copyright infringement by the up and coming Welsh web site 'Ewe Tube' It is believed 90% of the Welsh population now tune in to' Ewe Tube', wit...
Read full storySpoof writer doesn't wear underwear on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays
Spoof writer Buckwheatsbutt has admitted that he goes 'commando' on certain days of the week. The immensely popular writer of oddball nonsense and celebrity shit made the statement during his weekly newsletter, which is passed around in TheSpoof.c...
Read full storyGeorge W trying out for Boston Red Sox
News in today indicates that President George W Bush is strongly considering trying out for pitcher with the Boston Red Sox for next summers World Series. Sources reveal that the President will not meakly walk away into retirement after January 1...
Read full storyAussie cricketers caught in bed
Reports just out today reveal that Australian cricketers have been seen practising their skills in a empty river bed just outside Brisbane. Ricky Ponting and his band of merry men were seen with cricket equipment practising their catching, bowlin...
Read full storyAfrican Villagers Injured by Falling Turkeys
In a further attempt to impose a bit of Americana into the lives of third world countries, The U.S. based Christian Coalition funded a "Thanksgiving Relief Effort" designed to bring the American November feast to three countries in Central Africa. T...
Read full story5M Illegal Aliens Trapped Responding to Bogus Inauguration Invitations Promising Free Mortgages and Gas Cards!
Washington, DC/ AP - In a massive sting operation orchestrated by the lame duck Bush administration, 5M illegal aliens were arrested when they attended what they thought was another Democrat giveaway! In a scheme thought up by the Justice Departme...
Read full storyWoolworth in Radical Pic 'n Mix Refinancing Plan
Woolworth today announced that it's radical refinancing plan has been a huge success. The price of Pick 'n Mix has been doubled, but each purchase qualifies for one new share per sweet item. "We have had a huge take-up for the offer enthused a s...
Read full storyDiet Tips from Madame Bitters
Dearest Madame Bitters, I have had a weight problem my whole life and right now I'm the heaviest I've ever been. I've tried dieting and exercising but the pounds won't budge. Please help me, I'm desperate. -Fat & Frustrated in MS Fat & Frustrated: Normally I don't answer questions about diet and weight related issues and it's not because I don't know what I'm talking about. I...
Read full storyThe Nation's Bad Economy Is Now Even Affecting State Mottos
SCHENECTADY, New York - The nation's worsening economic situation is causing several states to make all kinds of in-state adjustments and changes. One of the areas involves the state mottos. Vito Bertazetti, one of the midwestern governors said t...
Read full storyObama Girl, Amber Lee Ettinger, says she has a couple of "wagging puppies" for the White House and hers are house broken too
Washington, D.C. - Obama Girl, Amber Lee Ettinger, says that Barack Obama can stop looking for a puppy for the White House because she has a couple he will be more than interested in seeing. "I've them under wraps up until now," said Ettinger. "B...
Read full storyFifty fun things to do during an exam
You should not attempt these things during an actual exam. The following is meant for entertainment purposes only. 1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early. 2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!" 3. I...
Read full storyPeople are stupid
President-elect Barrack Hussien Steve Obama and vice-president elect, Joe Biden Aka "Joe-The senator" were talking, when Obama said, "I hate all the dumb McCane jokes people tell about him." Wise Old Joe, feeling sorry for his old boss kid, said...
Read full storySarah Palin and the Silence of the Turkeys
Sarah Palin who has fallen for more news media pranks than autumn has leaves stumbled once again. After the hackneyed pardon a turkey for Thanksgiving stunt that a plethora of politicians stage every November, an Alaskan news local steered the fa...
Read full storySarah Palin Showed Harmid Karzai Her Alaskunt Brown Beaver
The Republican VPILF-NOT apparently sat somewhat indiscreetly across for Afghani President Harmid Karzai during one of her pretend I'm a real world leader playfests. Karzai, a real gentleman, didn't say a word about the beaver shot but US news so...
Read full storyHarris and Katona casualties of the BNP list!
Anita Haris, Andy Hamilton, Andy Hallet are all members of the BNP, say the tabloids. "Having the same intials as Hitler is no coincidence" said a tabloid journalist foaming at the mouth and eyes yesterday. Anita Harris protested, she was part Eas...
Read full storyNibiru will hit within the next week
Scientists have uncovered a way in which to attract and repel planets which orbit the lesser solar system. Professor Aimee Tracton has rigged together six hundred 1985 speak and spell electronic toys produced by Texas Instruments with a poker mac...
Read full story"Doc" Loses House, Claims Will Go Back In Time!
LOS ANGELES - Christopher Lloyd, the actor best known for his role as Doc Brown in the "Back to the Future" trilogy, was one of many who were left homeless last week after fire tore through an upscale L.A. neighborhood. Lloyd's $11 million mansio...
Read full storyHuman Evolution Process In Reverse, Says Top Scientists
GENEVA - A group of top world scientists known as "The BrainFrame" have been working together in Geneva for the past seven months on what's been called the greatest experiment on human brains ever. The study involved mapping and decoding human br...
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