British heavyweight boxer David Haye is to fight the giant 7'2" Russian, Nikolai Valuev. Most observers regard the match up as a re-run of David v Goliath from the Old Testament. Does David stand a chance? Our boxing correspondent Lefty Hook to...
The bible is to be rewritten following a survey's findings that nobody knew anything about it. In the survey the 10 commandments were largely unknown, Daniel (of the lion's den) was thought to be the Lion King and Dot Cotton was thought to be the Imm...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - And it came to pass today that President Barack Obama entered the Senate Chamber, and two great men did come and stand before him, Senate Majority Leader, Democrat Harry Reid and Senate Minority Leader, Republican Mitch McConnell,...
Recently somewhere between Sinai and Walthamstow, UK, the oldest ancient Bible was discovered. Scientists restoring the Bible have found to their shock and horror that the ancient Bible is just a collection of kiddies stories and nursery rhymes from...
SAN DIEGO, CA - While attending services at the West Coast Evangelical Church in Vista, CA this Sunday, reigning Miss California Carrie Prejean was unceremoniously removed from the premises after refusing to shut her mouth despite repeated requests b...
Thanks to The Gideons, historically The Holy Bible is a publication that is often seen as the cannabis smoker's and those deficient in toilet rolls last hope for salvation. In a move that will also leave dyslexic, insomniac, athiest hotel guests u...
In the beginning God created day and night. He created day for footy matches, going to the beach and BBQ's. He created night for going fishing, sleeping, and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good. On the Second Day, God created water for surfing, swimming and BBQ's on the beach, and God saw that it was good. On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants to provide malt and yeast...
Jerusalem - Rare documents were uncovered by archeologists this week believed to have been written by God prior to His creation of heaven and earth. Professor Calloused Hands, an archeologist teaching at the University of Wailing Wall in Jerusale...
When Barack Hussein Obama is sworn in as President of the United States, he will not have one hand on the Bible (a tradition dating back to George Washington). He will, instead, take the oath of office with one hand on the Koran (the scripture book...
A press release from publishers Blume & Bialistock said that the new "Gospel according to Jesus - in His own words" has become #1 New York Times Bestseller. A spokesperson for the 2008 year old veteran said, "Jesus (pron. 'Geesuss', not 'Heysu...
The Story of Creation Genesis 1:1 - 2:3 In the beginning, before God got to creating stuff there weren't much around. 'Cept darkness and water. Nothing else, though. God would fix that PDQ. The first day God must've got tired of wandering around in the dark because He made light. I reckon He was happy with it 'cause He seperated from it the dark- sorta like you would put all your bolts in o...
Atlanta, GA- American comedian Jeff Foxworthy of 'You might be a redneck' fame is a very busy man. In addition to hosting top rated prime time game show, 'Are you Smarter that a 5th Grader?'; creating and headlining the wildly successful Blue Collar...
Mecca, Saudi Arabia - Three million pilgrims at the 2008 Hajj were stunned when the devil threw stones back at them. The stoning of the devil is one of a series of rituals during the annual pilgrimage to Mecca that every able-bodied Muslim is expecte...
Christian fundamentalist and pyramid scheme, Order of the Divine Will and Testament professes that its belief in the resurrection of the dead at the Imminent Second coming of Christ entitles them to continue collecting the social securities checks of...
Yesterday, Barack "Alleluia" Obama, accompanied by Led Zeppelin, burst into Hooters, New York, and declared Bible law, just after ordering a Hooters Cobb Salad. "I am sick and tired of aging rockers and Democrats over tipping topless waitresses a...
Red Neck, Alabama - Just within two weeks of Barack Obama's historic win as the first African-American presidential candidate, ugly signs of racist white backlash are beginning to appear across America. Widespread incidents are reported from Main...
Immersion, Utah - The LDS church has gotten itself into hot water with Jewish Holocaust survivors and advocates over its controversial practice of Mormon proxy baptisms for the dead. Mormon's believe that no one can enter heaven's gates without fi...
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