London - (Brain-Dead Nazi Mess): After suffering severe withdrawal symptoms from Prince Charles's organic homegrown alternative herbal tobacco the Queen was discovered in a permanent vegetative state this morning in a Buckingham Palace allotment.
London - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Monday 15 June and it's all over bar the shitting for the world's longest running badass tribute act. At around 7.50 GMT the mighty gas giant Jupiter stands still in the heavens at 27 degrees Aquarius, sign of...
London - (Royal Perversion Mess): "Just another closet queen hoist by her own petard!" was the only comment from royal protection officers this morning after a gagged and naked Queen Elizabeth was discovered trussed up, a la David Carradine, in a se...
Earlier today, the Queen decided that her lack of invitation for the D-Day memorials was a step too far, and decided to prove to French President Nicholas Sarkozy that England should never be forgotten- by parachuting into the memorial service. Th...
Buckingham Palace - 'er family haven deserted 'er fer the Dee-Doy weekend and haven been uninvited t' official services in France, Queen Elizabeth commemorated the occasion of the 65th Anniversary of t' Dee-Doy landing, alone by 'erself at palace.
London - (Signs & Portents Ass Mess): Mystery street artist Royal Banksy of Scotland is the top official suspect following the appearance of an ominous Grim Reaper crop circle on the lawn of Buckingham Palace. The sight of the cosmic etching i...
As the farce of seemingly endless MPs - who never seem to do anything except steal and make loud noises on a Wednesday - being suspended and downgraded from Ministerial posts, but basically keeping their jobs after been caught thieving and lying, Her...
London - (What A Scandal Mess): The Queen used taxpayers' money to 'clean her moat' and 'subdue dry rot' a House of Commons Public Accounts Committee heard today. "That's just so setting a bad example to snout-on-the-trough MPs like Douglas Hogg!"...
London - (Epsom Salts Mess): The real reason why the Queen is not joining publicity-ravenous desperados like Gorgon Brown and Bollox O'Bummer at the 65th Anniversary of the D-Day Landings Ceremony was revealed today. The event coincides with the E...
London - (Frumpy Ass Mess): Hoax monarchy addict Queen Elizabeth II is under round-the-clock medical surveillance after losing a £1 million bet on her daughter Susan Boyle winning the Britain's Mein Gott! Talent contest this weekend. News of the...
French President Nicolas Sarkozy reacted angrily to accusations that he had snubbed the British people by failing to invite British royals to the D-Day celebrations on June 6th. "They were not invited because none of them were there," M Sarkozy sa...
The Queen was seen today in London's PoundCity with Prince Charles, followed by two very muscular security guards. She walked around the store, looking and taking many things, many people inside the nationwide store were looking and staring, whil...
British Queen, Peter Tatchell, today expressed relief upon hearing News that BNP leader Nick Griffin had "Been forced to pull out of Her Majesty's Official Function"! Mr Griffin was available for comment but Britain's steadfastly unbiased media or...
Ballybollox Castle, Scotland - (Fascist Ass Mess): Spurned and barred by Buckingham Palace garden party organisers from rubbing himself up against his fascist hoax monarchy relations BNP leader Nick Griffin has instead been offered a 'dirty' weekend...
Some of the world and alot of England has been awaiting the appointment of a successor to the British throne. Most have expected that at some point between senility and incontinence, the Queen would allow her near senile and mostly pee pantsing s...
Whitehall - The Queen has announced that all MPs, including PM Gordon Brown, are to be made redundant in the next federal election and replaced with farmyard animals. The Queen has faced enormous pressure from the public recently, to get rid of the...
Britain's leading smut peddler The News Of The World (NOTW), yesterday continued to show the worlds terrorists the best places to bomb in Britain, as well as the easiest way to gain entry. Yesterday two of its reporters, posing as two Middle Eastern...
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