New York City - The nation is sleeping through the wrong American Dream, and needs only to wake up to avoid the nightmarish problems it is facing. "If you don't think you're dreaming, examine the evidence that proves otherwise," said Kilgore Trout...
China sent a few guys who work in "waste management" on a trip to the White House recently to talk to President Obama about the money owed to China. A White House spokesman said that "some pretty big guys" showed up late one night and rang the...
The new National Flag of the United States was unveiled to a packed audience of international journalists during a press conference at the White House in Washington today. The new flag is the result of a 24 million dollar, five year study by an al...
The financial world is reeling at the announcement that the US of A is not quite as good at borrowing money as it was yesterday. This surprise news comes just days after the US decided that it could borrow even more money by raising its debt ceili...
The USA, once the world's most powerful nation, is now skint, boracic, on the bones of its arse, and on the verge of appealing to Bob Geldof, Midge Ure and Bono to stage a benefit gig for them at the Nou Camp in Barcelona. Which leaves Britain in...
American financial markets are in a frenzy as the country slips into deficit. 'We can't pay you' notices have gone out to all Government employees and the country is coming to a halt as half the population stop working. News of the disaster ha...
In an amazingly magnanimous gesture, Apple, the world's most profitable organisation, is to pay off America's debts. "What can I say?" said Steve Jobs at a press conference. "People can't buy iPads if they are worrying about their jobs, homes and...
China sent Obama a letter today that told him to calm down, and that China has no intention whatsoever of buying America. This is good news for many, who have been worried about China swooping in to claim us as their own like Americans did to the...
Prime Minister, David "Do Nothing Dave" Cameron, and Deputy PM Nick "Does My Bum Look Big In These Trousers?" Clegg appear all set to authorise the export of some mediocre British weather to the Americans. In recent days, temperatures in the USA h...
The Pentagon has announced plans to force openly gay soldiers serving in the US army to wear orange jump suits to give their heterosexual counterparts the due notification of their presence within their battalion, according to reports. Defence Se...
John Smith, of Scarborough, England, had not quite finished his dessert in the revolving restaurant atop the Skylon Tower, overlooking the Horseshoe Falls at Niagara Falls, Canada, when he saw the Mystery Blonde stand to leave her table. He had, e...
In a massive retaliation to the US government withholding $800m in military aid to Pakistan, NYC cabdrivers staged a noon day walkout leaving the city snarled in a massive traffic jam. The increased traffic threatened to shut down Wall Street and cau...
All vehicles returning to Canada from trips to the US of A are being inspected meticulously for smuggled items. This month it is NOT drugs they are looking for but FIREWORKS. News quickly spread through Canada at the beginning of the month that t...
During a speech at Westminster on Thursday, Labour MP David Lefty addressed the subject of Anglo-Canadian relations. "For years," Lefty remarked "Canada had a special place in our hearts as a a place that was a bit like America, but without the te...
Washington - Cannibals testifying before Congress today criticized the Obama Administrations recent change from the decade old food pyramid to the new MyPyramid. With much fanfare, the USDA recently retired the old Food Guide Pyramid and replaced...
Weird and wacky right winger Sara Palin gave the strongest clue so far that she would be throwing her hat in the ring for the 2012 Republican nomination when she laid down several strong policy statements. Palin, who is in the middle of her "One N...
A judge in California has come up with a novel approach to dealing with the state's overcrowded penal system. Justice Anthony Kennedy is to sign papers that will release 143,000 prisoners back on to the streets and in to the community. In a speech...
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