John Cooper Clarke's Flogging Oven Chips I was watching telly. ITV When a familiar voice jumped out at me A Mancunian accent from the past A cigarette-induced breathless rasp The name of the poet was on my lips John Cooper Clarke was flogging oven chips I couldn't believe it. I listened again The sponsor of the sacrilege was Mr McCain Not the US politician from the Christian right Bu...
MANHATTAN - The nation's most famous domestic entrepreneur recently sat down in her luxuriously exquisite Manhattan apartment and talked with Fitzwater Ribicoff of American Spotlight Magazine. Stewart who is 72, opened up to Ribicoff and expressed...
PHOENIX - President Obama has just announced that he and a committee which included Vice-President Joe Biden, First Lady Michelle Obama, former talk show queen Oprah Winfrey, and sultry actress Eva Longoria, have just come up with a brand new federal...
NEW ORLEANS - The former Queen of Cooking who has now become the nation's number one persona non grata was in the Big Easy hoping to land a job as a greeter at one of the town's Cajun food restaurants. As she was leaving the restaurant after her i...
OAK BROOK, Illinois - The world's largest restaurant franchise chain, McDonald's has just made a monumental announcement regarding its hamburger buns. Golden Arches Spokesperson Nancy Zabeletta has issued a statement that the fast food giant will...
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Justin Bieber appeared on The Viagra View and he revealed to co-hosts Larry King and Regis Philbin that he has a rather strange fetish. The 19-year-old said that he has never told anyone but he has a strong addiction to Chinese f...
On Wednesday, a manufacturer of "Whole Foods" announced that it plans to build a store in the poorest and most dangerous section of Chicago. The Englewood neighborhood, 10 miles south of downtown, experienced a 40% increase in homicides last year...
MILWAUKEE - All of her life, Millicent "Milly" Sauerbraten has said she's wanted to do something that would go down in history. Well the 68-year-old grandmother has now achieved that goal. Mrs. Sauerbraten participated in the 73rd Annual Milwaukee...
OAK BROOK, Illinois - The world's largest food franchise chain, McDonald's is experimenting with a new food item that it could be adding to its menu. Corporate Spokesperson Nancy Zabaletta told National Focus Magazine that company executives are p...
NEW YORK CITY - In what could possibly be one of the most profitable mergers in recent history, representatives for FedEx and Pizza Hut are having dialogue concerning a possible merger. Emma Violet Chimski, 43, a board of directors member with Piz...
DETROIT - Michelle Obama who is noted for preaching that school kids need to eat a nutritious meal and stop eating junk food was photographed at an elementary school in Detroit - eating a double pepperoni pizza. The news media had been told before...
OAK BROOK, Illinois - Word from the largest food franchise restaurant chain in the world is that they will soon be adding another entry to their McMenu. Mickey D's spokesperson Nancy Zabaletta informed the news media that after a year in the plann...
HOLLYWOOD - Skillfully blending recent lab-grown meat advances with universal fears of natural disasters like "SharkNados", noted screenwriter Ike Leber has mailed his latest movie script to the SyFy Channel for consideration. "FrankenBurgerNado"...
Pocono, Pennsylvania -- Gwendolyn Shopworn, a food researcher from Boston, expired earlier today while attempting to cross Pennsylvania's famous Bushkill Falls on a high wire. "This is a real tragedy," said Pocono Sheriff Snuffy Anastasia. "She'...
There is perhaps no politician in the United States who enjoys eating more than Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey. Governor Christie adheres to the adage popularized by 70s musical icon David Crosby who said on many occasions that he had never met food that he did not like. The New Jersey governor has revealed that he weighs 351 pounds and chuckles that about 198 pounds is water weight.
Balham residents Mr. and Mrs. Lyndon Transport told Spoof journalist Paxton Quigley how 24/7 broadcasts of Come Dine With Me and a local Waitrose had ruined their lives by turning their children against them and making them into pariahs in the local...
Paula Deen's Southern Fried Cooking World has collapsed around her quicker than a pile of Taco-Flavored Doritos around Kirstie Alley. Deen has learned a pretty hard to swallow lesson about what the politically correct world of today will allow and will not allow. And the ironic thing about it is she used a word; the "N" word that thousands of people use on a daily basis [i.e. rap singers, hi...
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