Beverly Hills, CA - Used car dealer, Mark Lipbaum, also known as 'Crazy Mark', has an offer we think most people would agree with. He wants commercial airlines to trade in their passenger jets; the ones that are short on reliability. He's willing...
Sacramento, CA - A confused trangendered woman named Loretta Martin and her friend, known only to the 3rd Appellate District of the California Court of Appeal as 'Jojo', have received suspended sentences following their appeal on a conviction of grow...
Washington, D.C. - President Barack Obama shocked the nation today by suggesting it might be time to go into Iran and 'crack some skulls.' In a dialogue with the press corp in the White House, Mr. Obama made the following statement, "...It's not...
Moscow - A Moscow teen, Svetlana Borskovicovich, who found a way to upload her breast milk to the internet, has been awarded a Nobel prize in physics. Said the Nobel committee, "...the ability for a female to upload their breast milk online and su...
Beverly Hills, CA - The story of Shawna Forde, the rogue Minutemen Civil Defense Corp gal who, acting as a defender of the U.S. border against illegal aliens, allegedly shot and killed Raul Flores and his daughter, is to be brought to the screen by H...
Sedona, Arizona - A man in Sedona, Arizona who is tired of getting crap all over the bottom of his bare feet has decided to clean up his place. Rodney Brewster, a former resident of Truth Or Consequences, New Mexico, moved to a small apartment on...
New York, USA - Currently in bankruptcy proceedings, Six Flags amusement park company has announced that it wants to partner with Qantas airline by taking over their Australia to Indonesia routes. "We feel," said Six Flags representative Durk Sme...
Halifax, Canada- An ant infestation in Halifax, Nova Scotia has Beatle, Paul McCartney, worried. The world-renowned tune smith and musician is set to play Halifax on July 11th. "I can't stand insects," stated Paul. "...and apparently these are Eur...
Toronto, Canada - Perez Hilton, famed celebrity gossip columnist in Canada for a music industry awards show, was assaulted by part of his plated dinner. As a result, city employees, in support of the gay icon, have all gone on strike. Said Perez...
Santa Barbara, Ca - Bioidentical estrogen, or 'Bioidenticals' have seen an uptick in popularity now that they have been given the green light by celebrities such as Oprah Winfrey and Suzanne Somers. But do they really work, and what are the side effe...
Toronto, Canada - Famous celebrity blogger, Perez Hilton, here for a Canadian music video awards show, is claiming to have been assaulted by a pea; and a green one at that, causing him to bleed actual blood. Police are investigating the allegatio...
Duluth, Mn - The great grandson of an illegitimate child born in Grandma's boarding house, the precurser to Grandma's Restaurant, has won the Grandma's Marathon in Duluth, Minnesota. The marathon got its name from its first sponsor, Grandma's Restaur...
Paris, France - Air France will offers victims of Air France 447 each $24,000 US. In analyzing how the corporation came to that figure, a company communications representative gave the following breakdown. "When executives went about calculating t...
Montreal, Canada - An early morning fire at a Montreal Swingers club forced many naked patrons onto the streets, wildly running for their lives. The club, Auberge 1069, located on Rosemont Boulevard near Christophe Colombe Avenue, has been a welcomin...
Blackpool, UK - A man who sells sputum for the purposes of conversion to biofuel has been charged with improper storage of a noxious substance. The man, 52 year-old Clayton Sproule of Blackpool, has pleaded no contest on this offence but not guilty o...
New York, NY - Talk show host, David Letterman, was rushed to Mt. Sinai Hospital in New York city this morning after he began having seizures and blackouts. Preliminary reports suggest he may be enduring a case of 'Terminal Adolescence'. Dr. Maur...
Arlington, Va - In a measure to deflect an increasing backlash from animal rights groups and republicans regarding President Obama's fly swatting incident, the White House announced today that it will seak to erect a new monument to adorn Arlington C...
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