Man Who Is Tired Of Getting Crap All Over The Souls Of His Feet Decides To Clean Up A Bit

Funny story written by Wire Piddle

Monday, 22 June 2009

image for Man Who Is Tired Of Getting Crap All Over The Souls Of His Feet Decides To Clean Up A Bit
Mount Brewster - Potential Ski Resort

Sedona, Arizona - A man in Sedona, Arizona who is tired of getting crap all over the bottom of his bare feet has decided to clean up his place.

Rodney Brewster, a former resident of Truth Or Consequences, New Mexico, moved to a small apartment on the outskirts of the town of Sedona, Arizona. Sedona is unique in that the dirt that gets tracked around town is a vibrant red color. After living in his new apartment for quite a few months, Rodney was alarmed to find that he was tracking around lots of crap on his feet, crap that would leave footprints on his floor and nasty marks on his bed sheets.

"So I decided," stated Mr. Brewster, "...that it really was time I tried to clean up a bit, make my abode a little more inhabitable; a more pleasant experience.

This revelation and subsequent actions to make his place more inviting stunned his neighbors at first. "When I first started to realize that Rodney was actually going to clean his place up a bit, I was stunned," remark neighbor John Turbot. "..but what he did next was just astounding."

What Mr. Brewster did next was to take an industrial shopvac and literally suck every speck of dirt out of his neighborhood. He then drove it up the road towards Flagstaff where he left it in a mound, a mound so big that the federal government felt obligated to send a team of surveyors out in order to update their map database and rename the mound, Mount Brewster, a mound large enough to sustain a complete downhill skiing community with several ski runs and chairlifts.

Under a little-known law in Arizona, if one creates a new landform, they can stake a claim on it, which is just what Rodney Brewster did. Now the taxpayers are up in arms and feel they should be able to share in any financial gains Mr. Brewster makes from his new mountain slash potential ski resort. "Hey," said Rodney, "...I made it. I own it. So back off Jack."

Several entities have so far expressed an interest in developing Mount Brewster into a ski resort/casino and all because a guy decided he wanted to '...clean up a bit.' Astounding indeed.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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