Thierry Henry, the former Arsenal striker who, reports say, would one day "love to return to the Emirates" after he has finished his playing career, has been told he is not welcome there. Henry, it was, whose handball incident in the World Cup pla...
Arsenal midfielder Cesc Fabregas has been captured by Barcelona - and they're not letting him go. The Catalan giants refused to comment, although speculation is rife that Fabregas is being held at La Masia, an academy-cum-torture confinement for d...
So, Arsenal players have proved to be just as greedy as many others. They could have 'kept it down a bit' for the sake of their fans instead of 'chanting out' for their bonuses after the game - words which echoed down the tunnels. It's rumoured that rather than go and meet with fans after the big win, they ran to grab their cheques and ducked out of a side door, ignoring the thousands waiting...
Arsene Wenger revealed today that there could be a possible investment in cash into Arsenal football club from Nigerian billionaire Aliko Dangote. "I received an email this morning," Wenger said with a Gallic shrug, "it said that Mr Dangote is Nig...
After admitting that Arsenal will end their fifth season in a row without winning so much as a pissing contest, their manager, Arsene Wenger has suggested that the club should follow the example of other unsuccessful clubs, like Liverpool. "I real...
It remains unclear how it happened, but what we do know is that Twilight sweethearts Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were cheering from the stands last night as Lionel Messi put four goals past Arsenal. A young woman seated close to the glamo...
The scene was set, Arsenal v. Barcelona. Wenger in a press conference. Messi in attendance. Messi's scintillating form in La Liga has led to many pundits branding him the finest footballer on the planet. However, veteran gaffer Wenger, claimed th...
Never one to miss out on a media opportunity, former Arsenal idol and confirmed World Cup cheat, Thierry Henry has promised a night of high emotion when he returns to the Emirates Stadium with his Barcelona team-mates to face his old club in the Cham...
Barcelona's Argentinian goalscoring machine, Lionel Messi shrugged off a question from a British journalist regarding Barca's chances of beating Arsenal in the Champions League quarter final tie first leg at the Emirates Stadium on Tuesday night.
Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger has confirmed this morning that he is "unlikely" to want to sign Hull City goalkeeper Boaz Myhill at any time in the forseeable future. The announcement came after Wenger's side overcame Hull's stubborn resistance in...
Londoner Sid Kent last night revealed how he went 'up the arse' twice in as many days with his wife's blessing. Going 'up the arse' is a soccer fan's way of saying that they have visited The Emirates Stadium, home of Arsenal Football Club - hence...
Ryan Shawcross, the Stoke City hatchetman who poleaxed the Arsenal midfielder Aaron Ramsey on Saturday, and was then selected for the England squad to face Egypt at Wembley on Wednesday, has said that "there probably is a bad bone in my body". Pot...
Following the comments made by Chelsea's German midfield general Michael Ballack that Arsenal are far too pretty to win the premiership, Arsene Wenger has hit back claiming he is just jealous because he's an ugly German bitch. ''Ee 'as a face like...
In the world's first ever live 3D sports broadcast, Manchester United thumped the Arse 3-1 at the Emirates, and ironically, Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger didn't see it because his 3D specs were all steamed up. Among some of the things Wenger missed w...
Sol Campbell, the football journeyman who recently left League Two side Notts County, has returned to the place of his former glories, Arsenal, and is to be made team captain again. Campbell, who left Arsenal for Portsmouth in 2006, became a 'firm...
Pompey's woes continued last night as they were comprehensively beaten 4-1 by freewheeling Arsenal, with goals from Eduardo, Nasri, Ramsey, and Song. Belhadj scored the home team's single riposte. Portsmouth, languishing at the bottom of the Premi...
Beleaguered Hull City manager Phil Brown has reacted furiously to claims that his team's latest defeat at the hands of Arsenal at the weekend was down to his poor team selection, and has made an amazing counter-claim, laying the blame squarely at the...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.
