Hull City Manager Phil Brown Blames Latest Defeat On Arsenal Players

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 21 December 2009

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It's never Phil Brown's fault

Beleaguered Hull City manager Phil Brown has reacted furiously to claims that his team's latest defeat at the hands of Arsenal at the weekend was down to his poor team selection, and has made an amazing counter-claim, laying the blame squarely at the door of the Arsenal team players who, he says, "were unrelentingly better than us".

City have now failed to score in their last three games, and a Geovanni missed penalty didn't help matters at the Emirates, but Brown insisted that the loss was due solely to the fact that the Gunners were "unfairly good", and has called for an investigation.

He said in an interview after the game:

"When the lads cross that white line, they are on their own. It's nothing whatsoever to do with me. Today, however, it has to be said that Arsenal were several classes - and a gulf - above our players, and this needs to be looked at. It's not my fault we lost."

He went on (and on):

"That Denilson goal is a case in point, whatever that means. It was unstoppable, and if a shot is unstoppable, how is anyone supposed to stop it? It's against the spirit of the game."

He went even further on:

"We got a penalty but their goalie was too good to let it in, and then the' was the Eduardo goal, and another from that coloured fella. I feel cheated. We're just not good enough, and that's just not good enough. How can teams like us expect to compete when there are teams of Arsenal's standard playing and hammering us every week?"

Phil Brown is daft.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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