Santa Claus - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 14 September 2008

Wow, the 2009 models are out and I just saw the new Dodge Thunderbolt Sleigh! Its got that new medal alloy frame, with diamond edge landing skids, and a fuel injection system that puts my old crate to shame. It's even got a Hemi! I'd be king of the hill in that sweet ride.

Mrs. Claus, however, says we can't afford one. She says it's her turn for a new mini-van.

I figure that I'll follow the current big business pattern and downsize a few elves, make everyone else work harder because they are scared about losing their jobs, and pay myself a big bonus.

I plan to be cruisin' in style on Christmas Eve!

Watch out, bad girls, your big daddy has got a lump of something in his pants for you and he is comin' to town!