Santa Claus - My Fake Diary

Monday, 15 September 2008

Well Diary,

You say there are only a few months until Christmas? Well, I say pish tosh to that. I laid of some of the Elves today, said we could not afford them anyway.

Donna and Blitzen are old now, maybe I will lay them of as well. Rudolph's nose is not so red anymore, since he gave up the drinking. I could wait until Boxing Day, and then lay the Elves of then, I would not need to recruit between now and Christmas, when they always ask for so much more.

I am led to understand that Mr Tumnus is just kicking around these days. Perhaps Gordon Brown will not be so busy at Christmas, not since I got that disc with everyone's address, and credit card details on it anyway. I need to have a Tom Tom for the Sleigh, and maybe some rocket boosters put in as well. The price of Oil is bound to go up soon as well. Perhaps I had better buy some Petrol now, while I can still afford it, just.

I don't really worry about my Carbon Footprint, I just take the one trip a year anyway.


Previous Dates Next Dates

« Full list of Spoof Celebrity Diaries

Send to a friend

Tell your friends about The Spoof!

Go to top
38 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more