Richard Madeley - My Fake Diary

Friday, 21 November 2003

That evil witch ruins it again!

Why do I take her out?

I took Judy out to the pub this evening as a treat, usually I lock her in the house and take all the spare keys with me.

Anyway, I was telling one of my saucy and hilarious jokes to the pretty bar maid. Judy kept saying "ignore him" to the pretty thing, I was ready for bursting her nose but I couldn't in public.

Then the bar maid just walked off and said "tosser!", I turned roung to Judy and made it clear that she brought the "tosser" comment on herself. That bar maid was right, Judy can be a tosser sometimes.

To think that I even let her have half a lager, she usually isn't allowed anything and this is how she repays me!

She stopped me getting some nooky with that barmaid so I'll be riding Judy tonight wether she has a headache or not. Yeah, that'll learn 'er.