Queen Elizabeth II - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Dear Diary - Princess Kate had better start showing me a little more respect - I am after all the Queen of England and she is merely the Duchess of Cambridge so I certainly outrank the little woman.

I have told my grandson William to talk to her and get her to stop acting like that American skank Chelsea Handler.

William says that it is just the motherly hormones that she is experiencing and that she will settle down eventually.

I told him to settle her down immediately or they can forget about visiting me and Phil at Buckingham Palace.

Queen Elizabeth