Queen Elizabeth II - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 6 March 2013

One spent a night in hospital after a dicky stomach bug - I strongly suspect that Charles has been bribing the kitchen staff to give me horse-meat.

Or even worse - corgi-meat. I should never have let him go to South Korea on a Royal visit all those years ago - when he came back he was talking to the plants.

The boys not fit to reign over the United Kingdom - like Alex Ferguson at Manchester United they will have to carry me out of this job in a coffin!