Osama bin Laden - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

Dear Diary,

It is later in the day and another marriage situation has presented itself, for one of my sons still in Saudi Arabia.

The fact is, I couldn't remember his name until the father of the bride mentioned it.

Perhaps I've eaten too many roasted lizards.

Speaking of which, I dreamed I ate godzilla last night.

Today, yet another father who says his daughter is perfect for my Omear.

That's it, Omear!

Then he tells mt that his daughter is Meshah.

"Meshah is bald as a garden gourd and her eyes are crossed."

"Barbara Streisand eyes look almost crossed."

"Meshah's nose looks like an anteater."

"So does Steisand."

"She has a good heart, Osama."

"OK, I admit she has a good heart. But she has a hump on her back!"

"So she's a huncback, everyone has some little flaw."

"You are starting to look like a lizard to me."

"Oh well, I tried. I'll check with my cousin who also has a daughter, I think."

"I'm not sure the one you have called Meshah is a daughter, have you checked closely? The hunchback may have produced a bosom in front."

"I go, Osama."



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