George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 20 August 2009

August, 2009

Dear Diary,

W. Here.

I got to thinking about writing a book about Dick Cheney if he writes one about me and I remembered how Laura embarrassed herself the first time the Cheney's came over to visit us.

They were expected over around six in the evening and we were going to have some cocktails and talk and then go out somewhere nice to eat.

Before they came, I told Laura that I wanted us to really get along with the Cheneys because if I got elected, I intended to name him as my Vice President.

One thing that Cheney is self-conscience about is that he's bald.

She said that she understood and would pretend to take no notice.

So we had some things to do early in the day and got stuck in a traffic jam. Anyways we got home late and Laura threw on her housecoat to straighten the place up a bit and at 3 PM, the doorbell rang.

When Laura opened the door, expecting a delivery person, there stood Cheney by himself. He had dropped by early to say they wouldn't be here this evening until 8PM after all, and that he had to run to a meeting and felt like he had to come by in person and explain.

So there stood Laura in her housecoat, her hair fussed and she opens the door and this is what I overheard:

"Why, Mr. Cheney, you're early! And here I am all dirty and Baldheaded!"

I can't put that in my book because she would kill me.

Maybe he'll put it in his.


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