George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 16 August 2009

August. 2009

Dear Diary,

W.Here.

That turncoat Cheney is trying to put out a book. He better not tell certain things or I'll write one with lots of funny pictures I've drawn of his bald head while in office.

Not that his bald head was in office. Oh, you know what I mean.

Never could have a decent press conference with that thing reflecting the sun in my eyes.

Cheney invested with Bernie Madoff! There I said it and I'm glad. So who's the pretty one now?

Hee Hee I remember the day Cheney told me, "Better come on over George, Bernie PROMISES 10%!"

Oh no I told him. I can get a safe 9 percent at the bank.

He asked me how and I told him: I put one third of our investments in one bank, another third in a second bank....

Well hecky dern I got that all balled up.

I put one-third of our moneys in THREE different banks at 3% and that adds up to nine percent.

I still do.

I still got all my money plus that 9 percent.

Who's the pretty one now?

W.