George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Dear Diary,

W. Here.

I always like to get up early and take a long walk around the ranch here in Texas.

I hate to say it but I got to thinking about the past few years and got lost. That makes it the third time.

Of course, when you're President you have secret service men with you and all I had to do was say, "Well, let's just head back to the old ranch!" and see where the guy in front headed.

Had some wonderful news today. My speech tour is going into other countries. I'll have some guards so it'll be fine. Can't go until Mama gets out of the hospital though.

The tour's being sponsored by Shoe World.

There's some countries I've never been to, like Prussia, that I used to hear about while in high school and never did get to go there, even while being President.

Cheney said it was near Yastrzemski.

Never been there either.

W.