George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 25 December 2008

Dear Diary,

W. Here. People are always riding my ass about those weapons of Mass Defunction. What do they call Saddam Gassing all those Kerds up north?

He had plenty of time to hide everything including himself. There's so many places there in all that sand and caves.

How long would it take us to dig up Iraq? Oh we looked, but after digging up over a hundred piles of shit, I told them to stop. Those people are just like cats. Crap in the sand and cover it up.

They taught us that in the National Guard I remember. You dig a trench then there's a whole line of squatters over it. When the last one gets up, you shovel over the whole thing.

One wise guy drill sergeant got us lined up and when we were all grunting and straining, he pushed the end guy over and down we went like dominoes.

Not a pretty sight...or smell.

We got him back though by short-sheeting his bed.

That was funny even though the whole group went on a forced crawl over the covered poop trenches.

Yep, things were rough those three weeks back then during NAN training. Not like today.

W.