Soccer Shock As Scandal Reveals "This Ain't Cricket!"

Funny story written by Morse

Sunday, 17 October 2010

image for Soccer Shock As Scandal Reveals "This Ain't Cricket!"
Soccer Scandal Reveals Another "Pay to Play" Scandal!

More scandal today surrounding world level sports as it was revealed that "anythings for sale" as long as enough money is involved, much to the chagrin of Fifa officials who are investigating reports that the 2018 World Cup Match Venue is available....'at a price!'

Unofficial reports are surfacing that the abandonment of efforts to secure the locale for either Australia or the US was that the 'price was just too steep,' and even Michelle Obama was appalled by the 'fee' suggested by the Nigerian delegate to secure his vote.

Recently voted (for how much) the World's Most Powerful Woman, (after reports she easily bench presses Barry over her head) the First Lady who failed in her attempts to secure the Olympics for her adopted home, Chicago, again came up empty as she tried to bring the World Cup there in 2018.

Reports are that the Nigerian delegate wanted a 30% interest in Presidential Advisor Valerie Jarrett's slum apartments that would have been torn down and rebuilt into a Futbol Village to the tune of $378M in Stimulus Money for 'Shovel Ready' Projects.

Jarrett, known for her tight fistedness, the apartments have not been repainted, or had their broken windows replaced for the past 12 years, refused, saying "this is my big F****g my lips...I ain't sharing the booty on this one!"

The other alleged vote seller, from Tahiti, was holding out for a Pelosi like deal cut by House Speaker Nancy Pelosi who legislated sweet heart deals for a major constituent in America Somoa which critics called 'fishy.'

Pelosi demurely declined deciding it was better to keep a low profile in view of the upcoming mid term elections where she is expected to lose her Speaker position, and may even be facing investigations which could see her sent
to a Federal Prison, in all places, Alaska!

Chagrinned Soccer Fans are crestfallen with the latest news, which leaves only the UK, Russian (no chance for a bribe there!) and conjoined efforts by Belgium-Holland (Political Correctness ?) and Spain-Portugal (can you spell Civilian Riots?) as the 4 entities still in the mix to win the rights.

The UK coalition, under increasing financial pressure to reduce costs and overhead, said they will re evaluate their position in the bidding, with Clegg saying, " we're going to get together and kick it around....maybe if we
de mob 4 Para we could get up enough bakeesh to win's a matter of national pride, don't you know!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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