Washington,DC/ Pentagon Update on Leaking Military News - President Obama, no longer thought of as having a decisive intellectual mind, has yet again prolonged making a military decision on Pentagon experts calling for increased US troops on the ground in Afghanistan.
An intelligence source, speaking off the record, as he was not authorized to comment on procrastination, said the President was swayed by an impassioned plea by former President Bill Clinton to send his wife, current Secretary of State, Hillary, and the highly decorated Vice President, Joe Biden, along with his wife, 'Jilly' to lead a peace mission into Pakistan, the acknowledged strong hold of the Taliban and Al Qaeda.
According to the source, Biden and Ms. Clinton were set to organize 'tent hall' meetings in the northern part of Pakistan along the Afghan border, where no Pakistani military dare venture, and a region long noted for it's fierce tribalism.
In deference to regional religion and custom, Ms. Clinton will wear a Burka bearing the imprint of the American Flag, and VP Biden will wear his Congressional Medal of Honor, won while being forced down in a helicopter in Afghanistan when the Taliban called forth a blinding snow storm which threatened his very life, according to the after action report and medal recommendation.
According to Secretary of the Treasury, Tim Geithner, the duo will be accompanied by members of the house finance committee who will be in charge of distributing another $6B in cash to the Pakistani Government as part of Obama's plan to halt corruption. Geithner said the thinking was by paying the influence buying money directly to the Pakistanis' the US could cut out both the UN and the World Bank from taking their cut...a measure strongly denied by the anti-american Presidents of both organizations.
On a related domestic note, rumours that Mr. Clinton has secured the services of a high priced divorce lawyer are apparently unfounded.
According to the former President, " No, certainly not....I would never divorce Hillary....it would cost way to much!"
Asked about his wife's mission which he suggested, he shrugged his shoulders dismissively saying, "it's all in the hands of Allah, now! "
Former Presidential Consort Monica Lewinsky, reached at her Nevada bunny ranch said only, "God Is Great!"
