Jackson's Hyperbaric Chamber Failed, Say Engineers

Funny story written by The San Francisco Onion

Friday, 26 June 2009

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New, improved hyperbaric chamber tragically not completed in time to save Jacko.

LOS ANGELES, CA - The tragic loss of the King of Pop has been blamed on the mechanical failure of a crucial valve used to regulate the pressure in Jackson's hyperbaric chamber, say hydro-mechanical engineers who inspected the equipment earlier today.

The legendary pop icon had used one of the glass-encased medical devices since the early 90's, reportedly to help him maintain his youthful appearance.

Doctors believe the valve that failed let pressure in the chamber decrease dangerously while Jackson slept, inhibiting the ability of his red blood cells to absorb oxygen, which forced his heart to work harder, triggering the superstar's later cardiac arrest.

Upon hearing this latest news, MacCauley Culkin publicly vowed to sue EZ-Rest Hyperbaric Chambers, Inc. "into oblivion."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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