LONDON - (Satire News) - BBC reporter Tyrus Bottomfiddle has just learned from an unnamed, but reputable source that King Charles III, has just hired the infamous London prostitute, Maggie May Cobblekiss, to be his personal palace assistant.
Miss "Cobby" as her clients, members of Scotland Yard, and most members of Manchester United refer to her, said that "Charlie" has agreed to double what she was making as a paid whore.
Bottomfiddle noted that Maggie May was making over $700,000 a year, and "Chas 3" has signed her to a yearly salary of $1.6 million [U.S.].
When told by some unhappy members of Parliament that they felt Miss Cobblekiss's salary was much too exorbitant, King Charles III, replied, "Fuck you pantywaist wankers...I will pay my gorgeously sexy assistant whatever the fuck I want to pay her, so fuck off your old, wrinkled Brit relics."
