ON THE WATERS OF THE BLACK SEA - (Satire News) - The Ukrainian government has just made it known that a group of Ukrainian naval fighters report that they have captured Russia's top naval officer, Admiral Svetlana Svetvinksi.
The admiral was aboard a Russian battleship, The Odessa, when the vessel was boarded by a group of Ukrainian naval sailors known as The Pirates of Melitopol.
The Pirates of Melitopol, were all specially trained at the U.S. Navy Seals naval base in San Diego, California.
While at the California naval base, the group of 47 Ukrainian Pirates, were personally trained by Capt. Vincent "The Shark" Butterwine, who is regarded as the best, the meanest, and the most outstanding Navy Seal in the entire nation.
SIDENOTE: Up until recently Capt. Butterwine, who looks like a black-haired version of Brad Pitt, was dating Khloe Kardashian.
