Storming Area 51...Not Such A Good Idea!

Written by Stefano M. Stefano

Saturday, 3 August 2019

Hundreds of people that decided to jump the gun and storm the American base called Area 51 found out that trying to break in was probably a bad idea.

'Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All of Us', a recently created Facebook event that was planned for September 20, 2019, at Area 51, was supposed to see as many as two million people try to break in and see little green men and their starships.

However, 300 overly-enthusiastic Facebook followers got their alien knickers in a bunch, and tried to lay siege to the United States Air Force facility within the Nevada Test and Training Range.

Before he went, the hippie-like leader, one 'Scooper Hendricks', revealed on his own Facebook posting, in a sea of suspicious smoke around him, "Yeah, man, like the truth is out there, man! Like reeeeally far out there, dude! Two millions dudes or three hundred, whatever, chief! Area 51 has alien tech that they don't know how to work, so how're they gonna shoot all of us, man?"

His friend, going by the name 'Wibbly-Wobbly Man', looking equally loony and hairy added, "I want one of them there phaser beam guns, man! They can't get alla us, man! Ya ever seen how bad those Stormtrooper dudes shoot, man? Terrible aim, dude! They couldn't even shoot that one kid, Luke Skybellwookie and his little droid, R2-D2-6G-K9-T3-M5-V8! Lame, man!"

So the intrepid group of 306 'dudes' and 'dudettes' stormed Area 51 in broad daylight at exactly 1:18 pm on Friday.

At exactly 1:19 pm Godzilla jumped out of the Area 51's biggest hangar, and gobbled up all the stoned stormers in one swoop.

So the truth is out there...no aliens at Area 51.
Just one very hungry, very big radioactive lizard!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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