Area 51 "Crawling With Aliens"

Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 18 July 2019

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The Facebook campaign that has sprung up on the social media platform to prompt other readers to storm Area 51, the US military testing sight in the Nevada Desert, is gathering pace with more than one million people registering their interest.

The prime objective of this unseemly rabble is to get a look at the aliens believed to have been kept there, in isolation, since the base opened in 1955.

But storming the base would be a big mistake, say Lincoln County residents, because Area 51 is literally crawling with aliens, and they might turn nasty.

Aliens of all different shapes, sizes and colors live there, according to eyewitnessess who live within close range. Many of these aliens speak English, and a few have even been spotted wearing US Air Force uniforms.

Some of them even crawl on all fours. Some have many more legs. Some have tentacles, and some leave slimy trails behind them. One looks like Donald Trump.

Shopkeepers in towns close to the base have said aliens often come in for provisions, or beer and cigarettes, and make no problems for the locals.

Ted Smash, the owner of a gas station, said:

"We get them all coming in here, filling up, sucking on the pumps, but they always pay for it, and they're no bother."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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