A man was admitted to hospital last night suffering from what medical staff described as 'withdrawal symptoms', after the website he writes pointless stories for, mysteriously crashed.
Moys Kenwood, 55, arrived at Hull Royal Infirmary in a state of alarm and outright anxiety, after having endured 48 hours of 'total blankage' whenever he tried to log-on to satirical news website, TheSpoof.com.
A female staff member at HRI, said:
"He was brought in on a stretcher by the Meat Wagon about 8 o'clock. He was in a state: palpitations, cold sweat, trouble breathing, hallucinations, crying for his mammy, filled his pants. Twice. It was a mess."
She went on:
"He was delirious, and kept mumbling summat about being chased by the Queen Mudder. Silly bastard!"
A ward cleaner, Florence Broom, said:
"E kept askin f'me phone, so's e could tryan log onto a webshite o'summat. Silly bastard!"
