Shamima Begum: Crowds Turn Out To Wave Her Off To 'Somewhere Else'

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 20 February 2019

image for Shamima Begum: Crowds Turn Out To Wave Her Off To 'Somewhere Else'
Get back to where you don't belong!

Shamima Begum, the girl who has been told she isn't welcome in England anymore, has attracted huge crowds who gathered in London to wave her off to wherever it is the UK government thinks they are going to send her.

Begum, 19, left Britain to join an ISIS training camp in Syria, then decided 'it wasn't for her', and indicated she wanted to return home.

'Home' is the key word here. The government, however, have decided to 'strip her of her UK citizenship' - whatever that means.

The UK government says it can strip her of her UK citizenship, because she is eligible for citizenship elsewhere.

After the news was released, it didn't take long for the streets up and down Britain to fill up with knuckle-dragging halfwits chanting slogans celebrating the decision to bar someone that was born in the country from entering it again.

One mealy-mouthed celebrant in London said:

"She ought to fuck off back to where she didn't come from, that's what I say!"

Others thought the same. In Parliament Square, a drunken mob gathered to show its support for the decision to condemn a British citizen to an uncertain and uncomfortable future. One of them, 'Baz' from Shepherd's Bush, said:

"She knew what she was doing. She deserves all she's going to get, the Muzzie bitch! This government has my full support. Well, today, that is."

But, in a dark recess in East Yorkshire, social commentator, Moys Kenwood, told me:

"The remnants of IS are behind the whole thing. If ever there was a last desperate rallying call to dislillusioned Muslims all over the world, to take up arms for their cause, this is it. They would have foreseen the short-sighted British government's decision not to allow Shamima Begum back into the country, and will have predicted the goading effect it will have on IS sympathisers throughout the UK. This decision will come back to haunt the government. We should prepare ourselves."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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