Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 19 February 2019

image for Australia-Bound! Shamima Begum To Be Sent To Penal Colony
Hoist the anchor!

Shamima Begum, the British girl who went to Syria to join the Islamic State terrorist group when she was 15, but who then decided she'd had enough of playing soldiers, and wanted to return to Britain, is to be sent to Australia in penal servitude.

Shamima, now 19, also has a baby boy who, like his mother, will, according to a statement by Prime Minister, Theresa May, yesterday:

"be clasped in irons, and despatched to the colony with all haste, within one of Her Majesty's vessels, and shall set sail on the first favourable wind."

Crowds of morons cheered.

Shamima will be the first non-convicted convict to be sent to the penal colony in Australia for decades.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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