President Donald Trump has given orders for his predecessor, Barack Obama, to be arrested and brought in for questioning amid allegations that, after he received a suspicious package through the post, he tried to return it to its sender via the US Postal Service.
Mr Obama received his package on Thursday, and, not being Irish, was immediately suspicious when he spied an unnecessary apostrophe in his name. He thought about notifying the authorities, but knowing their level of incompetence, decided against this, and had his wife go to the local postal center to return 'the goods'.
By this time, Cesar Sayoc was on the FBI radar, but, because of the immediate alerting of all postal centers, so was Obama.
Mr Trump tweeted:
"Ive wayted a long time for Barrack O'bama, and now his gose is cucked!"