Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 4 October 2018

image for TV Meerkats Refused UK Visas
нет (Nyet). Simples.

In the aftermath of the Sergei Skripal affair, and the recent decline in Anglo-Russian diplomatic relations, it's been revealed that the meerkats who feature in a series of TV advertisements for comparethemarket.com, have been refused UK visas, and must leave the country immediately.

This comes hot on the heels of the news, last week, that Chelsea football club owner, Roman Abramovich, had been refused a visa to allow him to reside in the UK, and a warning to other 'important Russians' that they may well be subject to the same fate.

The meerkats, who have been in the UK since January 2009, face an uncertain future, as the Kremlin has told them that, because of their 'defection' to Britain, they are no longer welcome in Russia.

Meerkat leader, Aleksandr Orlov, who is the owner of a home in South London, has been told that he has until 8 October to leave the UK, and to take his filthy horde of stinking Russian meerkat comrades with him.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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