Parents In Call For Naughtiness To Be Criminalized

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 15 September 2018

image for Parents In Call For Naughtiness To Be Criminalized
Inmate FE3685 'Benjamin'

Parents have reacted angrily to calls for a ban on smacking children in the home, by demanding that children be banned from acting naughtily, it has been reported.

The Association of Educational Psychologists (AEP) has called for physical punishment to be outlawed, because, it says, smacking is harmful to children's mental health. Corporal punishment is banned in schools, but is still allowed in homes, so long as it is 'reasonable'.

But, say parents, if smacking is made illegal, they will be unable to deter their children from being naughty, and being naughty should, therefore, also be made illegal.

One mum who defends a 'gentle smack' is Ruth, who said:

"My Timmy is always up to no good. I find a smack across his bottom usually makes him see sense. The 'naughty step' is ineffective, and other punishments like 'no TV' or 'grounding' haven't worked."

And another mother, Jackie Halfnelson, agreed, saying:

"There's nothing a good cuff round the lugs won't cure. But if they're going to make it illegal, they ought to look at making naughtiness an offence as well. It has to work both ways."

But Jeff Unrealistic of the AEP said:

"That won't happen. Otherwise we'd have to build dozens of large jails all over the country which would be stuffed to the gills with tiny miscreants who never stop crying, whinging and whining, who won't shut up, and whose faces are always covered in ice-cream."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more