Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 10 July 2018

image for Man Followed Through
Here's the filthy beast!

There was an embarrassing situation to deal with for one man this morning, after a fart he attempted to release from between his buttocks, turned into something more serious, and he followed through.

The incident happened in a bank in Battambang where about twenty customers were patiently queueing to be seen by the tellers. One man, in a red-and-white checked shirt and beige pants, clearly had a build-up of wind. Eyewitness, Moys Kenwood, told us:

"This chap kept looking around like he was bothered by something. Ten or fifteen minutes, he was acting suspicious. Then, he sort of bent his knees a bit, and there was this sound, like a racing car passing. The man straightened up, and darted off outside, walking oddly."

Little did Kenwood know, the man had shit his pants. Security guards followed the man out of the bank, and into some bushes by the side of the road, where he was emptying something into the undergrowth.

Kenwood:

"He reappeared soon after. He must have lived nearby, because he'd been home and changed his beige slacks for some others which were very similar, but which had chocolate brown streaks around the seat."

It's thought the man must have been a VIP who had, somehow, joined the wrong queue, because he was ushered into a side room for more privacy, and then booted out into the street.

Several members of the bank's staff then thoughtfully sprayed air freshener, to create a fragrant experience for its valued customers.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Poo




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