An estimated 800 convicted babies, some of them up to 19 months old have been granted pardons after DNA tests proved some of them were not even born at the time the alleged crimes were comitted.
Investigations by the Internal Affairs Department into tampering with thumbprint baby signatures have lifted the lid on over 1000 potentially unsafe baby convictions. Some infants have already served their sentences and will be eligible for compensation if the tests clear them of involvement in crimnal activities.
Baby crime appears to be linked to a complete lack of common sense in certain Prosecution jobsworth officials. A recent meticulously planned heist on an apple and banana pudding delivery by an armed gang of rattle waving toddlers was thwarted when two mothers changed the gang members nappies in the middle of the raid.
