New Sport Introduced At Sochi Olympic Games

Funny story written by Keith Shirey

Friday, 7 February 2014

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A new sport has been introduced in today's Olympic games in Sochi. It is Mixed Martial Arts. MMA events will be fought in wire cages, as is the custom in the United States. The purpose of cage fighting is to punch, kick, and pound a man or woman into submission. The result is that loser is often beaten to a bloody pulp.

Since its inception in the United States, in 1993, in there have been 8 deaths connected to the sport. They have occurred in the U.S., Ukraine, South Korea and Bolivia.

Of course the violence and possible termination of life associated with MMA Cage Fighting, has made it controversial. In a statement released today, the International Olympic Committee defended its decision to include the sport in the 2014 games. The report reads:

"As violence, brutality and death increase in the world, it is the stand of the Committee that Olympic games reflect current culture realities and be up-to-date. Most countries in the world now glorify the military, calling all soldiers 'heroes.' The age of extolling peacemakers is long past."

"Too, as modern technology manifests itself in almost all countries of the world, citizens revel in vicious cruelty, unrestrained violence, and gory bloodshed on TV and in video games..

MMA Cage Fighting is as close as sport can go in reflecting actual combat deaths in war as an honored institution, and in mirroring cruelty and sadism as the major form of cultural entertainment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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