Tiger Woods' megayacht seen 'bobbing madly' on calm seas

Written by Helen Tarnation

Sunday, 20 December 2009

image for Tiger Woods' megayacht seen 'bobbing madly' on calm seas
Tiger's 'Bimbo Boat' making waves

In the aftermath of revelations that he has been multiply unfaithful to his wife, Tiger Woods, the world's first golf billionaire, has decided to spend the holidays on his megayacht, 'Privacy'.

Woods has recently been dodging the press, the police, and at least a dozen mistresses and their lawyers since the news of his infidelity broke. While on the run, he's been spotted with US President Obama, and identified as a suspect in a break-in at a convent.

His hideout on the megayacht was revealed by his mother, Kutilda Woods, who says she is 'hurt, angry and disappointed' in her son over his philandering.

Woods' $2 million megayacht, christened 'Privacy', is 157 feet long. It boasts a VIP stateroom aft, with mirror queen cabins amidships and a twin cabin with Pullman nearby, along with accommodations for a crew of nine.

On the calm waters of Puget Sound, the yacht was seen 'bobbing madly' by fishermen who ply the waters of the Sound.

'That's a big boat', said Roger O'Reilly. 'It takes quite a bit of energetic bouncing to make waves like that boat was making.'

Since Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs, Kalika Moquin, Jamie Jungers, Mindy Lawton, Cori Rist, Holly Sampson, and Joslyn James have not been seen recently, many believe they are all aboard the megayacht, negotiating legal settlement of their claims.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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