Rachel Uchitel: 'Size Does Matter!'

Written by Gordo Plenty

Sunday, 20 December 2009

image for Rachel Uchitel: 'Size Does Matter!'
Part of Rachel Uchitel reason for size making a difference

Heddinghausen, Germany - Rachel Uchitel, in an exclusive interview, let it be known that size does matter.

'If a woman says that size doesn't matter, her boyfriend or husband has a teeny weenie. Size is very important', she said when asked about her attraction to Mr. Woods.

'I have to admit, he is rather tiny, about like a 10 year old boy', she admitted sheepishly during the interview. 'But, hey, his bank account is huge, and like I said, size does matter. You can overlook anything as long as there is green to back it up.'

When asked about Theresa Rogers assertions about a skin abnormality in Mr. Woods groin area, she looked rather embarrassed.

'Yeah, its true. I didn't know it was weird though. He said it was because of his British heritage. He said they all liked spotted dick.'

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more