Mitt Romney gets campaign contribution from Chinese Wheat Gluten industry for his National Lampoon's 'Vacation' style road trip

Funny story written by Robert W. Armijo

Sunday, 1 July 2007

image for Mitt Romney gets campaign contribution from Chinese Wheat Gluten industry for his National Lampoon's 'Vacation' style road trip
Romney family out on their National Lampoon's 'Vacation' with dog on car roof...Oops, where did he go?

Salt Lake City, Utah - Upon hearing the news of Republican Presidential candidate, Mitt Romney's National Lampoon's 'Vacation' style 12-hour road trip with his dog, Seamus, in a kennel tied to the roof of the family station wagon, representatives from the Chinese wheat gluten manufacturing industry announced today they would be donating one million dollars to his 2008 Presidential election campaign fund. The announcement left animal rights activists apprehensive.

"We assure you Romney has no intentions of accepting the money," said a spokesperson for the Romney for President in 2008 campaign. "It would be unconscionable for him to do so in light of the controversy in his temporary lapse of judgment he exercised in placing the beloved family dog on the roof of the car for that mere short trip from Boston to Ontario."

The spokesperson then explained that Romney had the welfare of the dog in mind at all times and that he place him on the car roof, concerned that it was too hot in the car and the dog was not getting enough air.

In a failed attempt to lighten up the moment, the spokesperson then nervously made the comparison of Romney's actions to that in the movie "Vacation," since the incident occurred while he and his family were on holiday and the same year the movie was released, 1983.

In that movie, Clark Griswold, played by Chevy Chase, ties the family dog to the car bumper and drives off forgetting to untie the dog; later he places the dead grandmother on the roof the car, which the Romney spokesperson was alluding to apparently in an attempt to use humor to defuse the seriousness of the situation.

In Romney's case, Seamus suffered a case of diarrhea while on top, which Romney remedied with a wash down from a water hose from a nearby house before continuing on the road trip, Seamus still on top, of course.

Animal rights activists, however, quickly point out that was a movie and unlike Romney's family dog, the dog in the movie was never in any real danger of being harmed.

"Romney assures you the dog was not harmed," continued Romney's spokesperson, whose voice began to shake and crack a little. "Umm, in fact, the dog enjoyed it so much that to this very day the kids have pull the dog off the roof of the car because it keeps jumping onto it every time Romney pulls out of the driveway."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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