LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - A reporter with The National Rumblings News Agency, Traci Diddle recently met with Melania Trump at The La Brea Tar Pits Diner.
The two talked about the rising cost of lipstick, the ever increasing price of tampons, and the fact that Donaldo (Mr. Melania Trump) used to smoke cannabis while he was living in the White House.
The soon-to-be-ex-Mrs. Trump told Miss Diddle that her asshole husband suffered from bone spurs in his ankles, his wrists, and his crotch.
When asked where in the world he would get the weed, she giggled and said that he got it from daughter Ivanka, who would get it from Rudy "The Swamp Creature" Giuliani.
SIDENOTE: Melly, as her BF LeBron James calls her, giggled and said that sometimes Donaldo would get so high on marijuana that the bozo (her word) would stick McDonald's French fries up his rectum.
