A Kansas Farmer Teaches His Rooster To Crow The Star-Spangled Banner

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 22 July 2022

image for A Kansas Farmer Teaches His Rooster To Crow The Star-Spangled Banner
Farmer Oleander Window says Murray has learned to crow over 90 notes.

WIZARD OF OZ, Kansas - (Satire News) - Kansas farmer, Oleander F. Window, 58, says that he has been raising egg-laying hens for over 37 years.

He pointed out that he has seen lots of unusual things, from a Rhode Island Red hen that will lay seven standard-size eggs in a 24-hour period, to a rooster humping three different chickens at the same time; which does seem somewhat fucking impossible, but Window showed a reporter with the local PBD affiliate, TV Channel 80 a video he took of the 'foursome."

Information guru Andy Cohen, actually interviewed farmer Window and learned that the secret to get Murray the Rooster to sing the "National Anthem" is to add a little bit of Corona Extra Beer in his rooster's morning meal.

Window at first said that during the first two weeks, Murray the Rooster would simply crow out music scales. But then all of a sudden Murray began to actually crow one of the most popular songs in the entire nation, "The Star Spangled Banner."

SIDENOTE: Andy Cohen said that Murray has been signed to appear on "The Jimmy Kimmel Show" as well as at a grand opening of the newest Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant in Topeka, Kansas.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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