To show his support for Russian pal Vladimir Putin, former White House resident and looser of the 2020 presidential election, Donald Trump announced plans to visit the Russian troops. The troops attempted to advance into Ukraine after being unceremoniously pushed out and back into Russia.
He asked Fox News broadcaster and Russian sympathizer Tucker Carlson to accompany him. Tucker, however, could not be located.
While immediate family members had deep reservations about Trump's visit to the Russian/Ukraine border, Melania was all for it. Not that she planned to make the trip with her husband, but she felt he should make an appearance.
"If Nancy Pelosi, a woman, can make the trip to Ukraine and shake hands with Zelenskyy, Donald should also go and support his good friend Mr. Putin."
Her husband remained confused by her enthusiasm.
Though Trump's two older sons are experienced elephant and giraffe killers in Africa, both declined to accompany their father to Russia. "Killing a helpless elephant or a giraffe in Africa is one thing, but going into a war zone even with Secret Service protection, could be dangerous."
"Yeah," agreed the other brother.
Sean Hannity declined to accompany Trump to Russia, followed by Rudolph Giuliani, Jim Jordan, Mark Meadows, and Steve Bannon, each claiming to have other commitments.
Trump began to get cold feet. "I'm beginning to feel my bone spurs spiking up."
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