Five Wonka Bars Contain Golden Vaccination Ticket

Funny story written by Wildpete

Friday, 5 February 2021

image for Five Wonka Bars Contain Golden Vaccination Ticket
Wonka Bar

WONKAVILLE – The Wonka Corporation (a Unilever subsidiary) has announced that, in five of its Wonka Bars, there will be a Golden Ticket that allows the winner to receive a free Covid-19 vaccination.

“There was a promotion like this a few years back,” stated Wonka CEO, C. Everett Bucket. “We thought it would be fun to stir things up again. Anyone who finds a ticket in their Wonka Bar will win a free trip to the factory here in Wonkaville. First vaccination the day you arrive, second one 2 weeks later. You get to jump in front of the line. Not before me, of course, but sure as hell before any of those Oompa Loompas get a shot.”

Late-breaking reports state that Elon Musk has already found three of the tickets.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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