The Sexiest Sheriff In The USA Has Been Re-Elected in a Landslide Victory

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 19 November 2020

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Many felons are shocked to find out just exactly how hard Sheriff Amanda can kick.

TULSA – (Satire News) – Tulsa’s Channel 91 Eye-Spectator News has verified that Sheriff Amanda Timberwine, has been re-elected by a percentage vote of 89% to 11%.

Comedian Zydeco Dupree told a Las Vegas audience that Sheriff Timberwine is a perfect example of why a brutha would love to take the law into his own hands.

Mandy, as her boyfriend calls her, is an ex-pole dancer, who thanked the voters for electing her on her law enforcement merits, and not just on the fact that she had a fantastic set of tits, long, luscious, legs, and an ass that is even hotter and sexier than J.Lo's.

iRumors reported that old has-been, Arizona Sheriff Joe “Pinky” Arpaio, 101, sarcastically said, upon learning that Sheriff Timberwine had been re-elected, that a woman has no business being a sheriff.

When word got back to Sheriff Amanda, she smiled and said that Joey is so darn old that he has most likely forgotten what a woman’s crotch cookie even looks like.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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