Tab Drink And Donald Trump To Be Retired

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Friday, 16 October 2020

image for Tab Drink And Donald Trump To Be Retired
Things go better with a Coke!

After sixty years, Coca-Cola has announced plans to retire Tab, which was once its new diet soda, to trim Cola’s portfolio.

Also retiring is Donald Trump, by voters of the United States, to regain the nation’s stature in the world, and trim the turbulence he deluged on the nation with his incompetence.

While Tab always offered a refreshing, thirst-quenching drink on a hot, summer's day, Trump just produced one big, heartburn burp. Pardon me. Again.

Donald Trump’s retirement celebration will occur on November 3, 2020, just a couple of weeks and days away. Street parties are planned, along with Am-Track celebrations on commuter trains throughout the country. Tab might still be served as a final happy farewell.

There's no information on how Donald Trump will react to his four-year early retirement. It won’t be pretty. And he can’t claim bone spurs to avoid eviction, and remain safely ensconced in the White House.

Will Trump and Barr and Miller and McConnell and Mnuchin and Giuliani and Cruze and Jordan and Devin and Lindsey and the rest of Trump’s sycophants who were complicit with his abuse of power be prosecuted?

Can’t speak for Coca-Cola, but using a farewell Tab to celebrate the Trump retirement might just be a Martha Stewart good thing.

Skip the burp. He’ll be gone.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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