Ouch! One more time! Donald Trump has secluded himself in the White House, stunned with the revelation that Democrats are mulling over the possibility of a second impeachment trial.
So reported a White House source.
Maybe even before Christmas, but if they work real, real fast, during election week in November.
“Thanksgiving,“ announced Attorney General Bill Barr, breezing into the room. “Not to worry. I’ll just have Pelosi and Schumer arrested and kept under house arrest until January 20. You’ll win the election, wink, wink, be sworn in, and release them on a $20 million bail. That’ll snap the both of them into Republican loyalists.”
Trump asks about the wink, wink election win.
“Putin said it’s already in the bag. Same with the Peace Prize, and Ivanka is going to win the Mrs. America prize. He can’t, however, get the Food Network to give Melania her own cooking program along with her line of Slovenian kitchenware.”
Relieved, Trump congratulated Barr, and decided to go ahead with whatever was next on his list. He announced that he wouldn’t worry about a second impeachment, and would ignore it as he ignored the coronavirus. “It’s up to the Governors.”
“I’ll just call it a second helping of PEACHES. We can make peach signs and placards for supporters to hold up at the indoor rallies. My MAGA people will go absolutely crazy over that one; the disgusting, blue-collar, working slobs.”
Getting back to more important issues, Trump asked why Melania didn’t get the cooking program with her line of kitchenware on the Food Network.
Barr regretfully explained, “There’s already an Italian working at the network, and she can hurl a frying pan across a conference room with 100% accuracy. She doesn’t miss, and she didn't want the competition.”
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