ROULETTE RIVER, Nevada – (Satire News) - The president headed west to hold another in his series of Presidential GOP Mask-less Campaign Hate Pep Rallies.
He was cheered on by a throng of over 87 people who cheered every word that came out of his mouth; especially the words hoax, Ivanka, and hamburgers.
After the event, he was asked by a reporter with the Las Vegas Citizen-Review if he was worried about possibly losing the election.
Trump smiled like the Canadian cat that swallowed the Costa Rican canary.
He dabbed at a couple of his orange hairs that had fallen out of place, and said that he was not in the least bit worried about losing.
When asked how he could be so sure, he said because even if Joe Biden beats him by 14 million popular votes, he will still win because of the Electoral College vote.
He then added that, just to make sure that he doesn’t lose, he has just named himself to be the director of the Electoral College.