Nashville Man Questions whether He’s Truly Evolving

Written by Chrissy Benson

Wednesday, 29 April 2020

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Evolving Trent Buchanan realized that what had seemed just another stupid idea of his mother's actually wasn't that stupid.

Always intent on being on the cutting edge of his species, 42-year-old Trent Buchanan of Nashville, Tennessee, had been certain that he was personally helping advance humanity – only for a call from his mother inquiring about his job status to cause him to question whether he was in fact achieving any evolutionary progress whatsoever.

Immediately reverting to his standard refrain from childhood, Trent retorted to his mother, Cindy Buchanan, "Jobs are stupid. Super stupid. No one actually works these days." He scoffed dismissively. "Haven't you heard everything’s gone remote?”

Trent's mother ignored the pushback and responded with yet another question. "Is it stupid to pay the bills without having to borrow money from your parents every month?”

"Double-stupid," replied Trent. "Double-super-stupid, that is.”

In a follow-up partial concession, however, Trent eventually caved to his mother's insistent suggestion that he download an app on his phone that would enable him to deliver food and packages for money.

“At first I thought it was just another one of her super-stupid ideas,” Trent explained. “But when I thought about it for a second, it actually wasn’t that stupid.”

Trent ended the conversation with his mom feeling bolstered by the progress – mental and emotional as well as financial – he’d witnessed in himself over the course of the eight-minute chat with his mom.

“Sometimes it’s hard to tell how far you’ve come until you get a little distance. But I was able to get a little hindsight in 2020," he said. "Not too shabby.”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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